Awesome photo by Lopiccolo!
NOTE TO HEARTISBREAKING: While it’s great that you liked this photo enough to blog it, you should probably make the photo credit clear (Lopiccolo or The Bin Fox) if you aren’t reblogging the original post ( http://thebinfox.tumblr.com/post/4183429942/ready-to-ride-a-man-is-patienly-waiting-on-his )
All photographers appreciate it when people admire their photos, but they also appreciate when proper credit is clearly given. Just sayin’
My birthday was kind of weird this year. Both my parents are gone now, so it was the first year that I really felt old, the first year that I really sensed my own mortality. This made turning a year older a little less celebratory and a little more depressing. I miss having parents to hug me and wish me a happy birthday. Maybe that’s why God (or whatever you believe in) gave me such a beautiful kid? Maybe everything does happen for a reason. Maybe we luck out in some ways while other things seem so unfair. I don’t know. Anyway, I digress. Back to the birthday…
Besides missing parents, my birthday was a bit odd this year in other ways. I planned and planned for a party and when it happened it felt kind of…flat. I didn’t really run around and have fun even though I had help planning it so I could enjoy it on the day. I felt like something was missing. Maybe because there were a few things missing….
Many friends made the effort to be there, and I appreciate that greatly. BUT at the same time, I can’t help but be hurt by those that made lame excuses, lied, or otherwise concocted questionable reasons to avoid my party. I wouldn’t really be bothered except for the fact that some of these people are friends. What happened to honesty? If you have something else going on and tell me straight up, no problem! I will understand. If you tell me you have to miss my party because you have to take your little brother for a walk before the moon comes out so he doesn’t turn into a werewolf, well, then I will probably have a bit of a problem believing you. This doesn’t cover the people that said they were coming and never showed up on the day. What’s up with that? Don’t you knwo when you RSVO to a party that food and drink are purchased just for you? Do you think I want all of that extra food and drink after the party? Not really. There are always going to be people that blow off your birthday. It happens. I can handle a little rejection. The thing that really bothers me, though, is being forgotten altogether.
Yes. A person or persons (who shall remain nameless) actually forgot my birthday this year. It has happened before. I know we all lead busy lives and I know that little Facebook notification doesn’t always get noticed. But when I go out of my way to honor someone else’s birthday, I kind of hope, deep down, that they will at least acknowledge my special day. I make cakes. Pretty cool cakes. If I make you a cake for your birthday, you don’t have to make me a cake for mine. Just saying “Happy Birthday” and giving me a hug would be great. A card or Facebook message would be nice too. Just saying “Oh, I didn’t know it was your birthday today” and just leaving it at that without rectifying the error is not sufficient. This is especially true if you follow me on Twitter and I have tweeted for a couple of weeks about how excited I am about my upcoming birthday.
That brings me to social networking and blog sites. Why do people acknowledge some birthdays of friends with a special shout out or post and not the birthdays of others? Is this extra expression in direct relation to the positive feelings (and or love & admiration) a person feels for a friend, or is it just a luck of the draw action (for example: “I have a little extra time so I am going to post a funny birthday video on my friend’s wall for their birthday”)? Curious.
Birthdays don’t seem the same. The older I get, the less magical the event seems. I want to celebrate, I want to feel like dancing around the room, giggling and saying “It’s my birthday!” to everyone I encounter. I want to look forward to my birthday for the smiles and warmth it brings, and yes, for the little bit of extra attention it brings. Why, then, do I feel so down? Why do I let the absence or inattention of a few friends matter so much? Are my expectations too high?
Am I hurt? Yeah, a little. Am I sensitive? Yeah, a little. I guess I’m getting cranky as I get older. Oh well. There’s always next year. Happy birthday to me.
Millions…Billions….Trillions
LOL
